Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Kinky Friedman for Governor

Kinky Friedman, of Kinky Friedman and the Texas Jewboys fame, is running for governor of Texas. Some of you will be familiar with Mr. Friedman's series of mystery novels - others will remember albums like Sold American, and songs like The Ballad of Charles Joseph Whitman, and what may be the only country tune about the Holocaust, Ride 'em Jewboy. Many years ago, I had an opportunity to see Mr. Friedman perform at the old Bamboo Club here in Toronto. It was white roots week, and Kinky was playing with some local boys, "The new Texas Jewboys". The opening performer for Kinky was one Joanne MacKell, who later became a regular at the old Pine Tree tavern, with her band at that time, The Yahoos.

If I lived in Texas, I'd vote for Kinky. His campaign slogans are "Why the hell not", and "How hard could it be?".

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Mr. A:

You say, "some of you will be familiar with Mr. Friedman's series of mystery novels - others will remember albums."

I bet most of you won't be too familiar with Mr. Friedman's views on various political issues. There are sources for all ten of these points at http://stopkinky.blogspot.com/.

1. Kinky's own website quotes Kinky telling the New York Times, "I'm not pro-choice." Elsewhere on Kinky's website he simultaneously claims to believe in a woman's right to choose (apparently, Kinky's also believes he can have his cake and eat it, too).

2. At a recent death penalty trial, Kinky testified under oath that although "he used to support the death penalty, Friedman told jurors he's now against it." Yet Kinky's website also says "Kinky is not anti-death-penalty."

3. Kinky gave an interview to Ruminator magazine where Kinky said "I voted for Gore" in 2000: "I was conflicted ... but I was not for Bush that time. Since then, though, we’ve become friends. And that’s what’s changed things.... I agree with most of his political positions overseas, his foreign policy.... What he’s been doing in the Near East and in the Middle East, he’s handling that well, I think." Yet that's clearly a lie because according to Kerr County voting records, Friedman voted in the 2004 presidential general election but not in any other contest since 1994.

4. Kinky wants to take money generated from sales tax and other state revenue sources and give that money away only to Texas property owning corporations and people with those owning the most valuable property getting the biggest windfall (Live in an apartment? Tough! Do you live in a modest house? Too bad!).

5. On a November 8, 2005, Kinky appeared on a nationally televised CNBC news program, where he was asked about his views on criminal punishment. Kinky replied, "Throw 'em in prison and throw away the key, and make 'em listen to a Negro talking to himself." When asked whether his use of the word "Negro" was racist, Kinky replied "no ... it's a charming word."

6. Kinky would address Texas' public education funding crisis by letting "the corporate sector bid on funding athletics." (What exactly does Kinky think the corporations will be getting from our children in exchange for their high bids?)

7. Kinky proposes to deal with immigration issues by building a wall along the Texas-Mexico border and by outsource our border security to five Mexican generals who we'd pay based on how successfully their armed thugs kept immigrants from crossing our border.

8. Kinky supports school prayer and posting the Ten Commandments in Texas classrooms (no word on whether Kinky has decided to post the Hebrew, Catholic, or Protestant version of the "Ten Commandments").

9. Kinky hasn't even gotten on the ballot yet, and he's already made plans to offer top political appointments to his biggest campaign contributors.

10. Kinky's candidacy is aimed a drawing votes from young independant voters who do not know where he stands on many issues, and yet Kinky has run for office before (as a Republican, not an independant), the only time Kinky said he voted for a Democrat in the past decade it turned out that Kinky lied and he actually didn't vote but when Kinky said he voted for Bush/Cheney in 2004 that proved to be the truth, Kinky has numerous Perry-supporting Republicans financially backing his petition drive, and if Kinky can draw off any significant number of independant votes, his candidacy will have the nearly certain effect of guaranteeing the re-election of arch-villain Rick Perry.

greatwhitebear said...

KINKY'S RIGHT. If Dubya did it, and the state survived, how hard COULD it be!

mister anchovy said...

You mean Kinky's serious about running? I thought it was a put-on.